The Corporate Shill

What?

Organism in search of exponential growth via the acquisition of whatever symbols of status or power are easily quantified within its own ecosystem - such as the cultivation of a troublesome moustache.

Who?

Spiritually bankrupt businessman who can make your dream a reality at 4.99% to 13.19% p.a*

When?

Monday - Friday, 9AM - 5PM.

Where?

Probably at a restaurant abusing the waitress because the coffee she served him didn't wake him up from his bad dream.

How?

By operating within the narrow confines of the blueprint, oblivious to the petty indulgences of truth, beauty, and wonder, a monkey may attain an elevated position within its tribe, allowing it to use the skills and abilities of lower lifeforms to further its own status and power.

Why? Scum rises to the top.